The fun? of Losing your Hearing….

Doc says it’s not the Rock Concerts I went to as a teen, it’s not the ton’s of airplane flights I’ve been on, it’s not the loud music in the car, it’s not anything I’ve done… it’s just genetic.  Makes sense… my Aunts and Uncles have all lost their hearing - but they were much older than me when they noticed.  I didn’t really notice… my family did.  It took them 2 years to convince me that there was a problem.  Yeah… so I can’t hear the oven timer, I’ve never been able to rely on that.  Even in my early 20’s I preferred a timer that hung around my neck to remind me I was cooking.   I did notice that on my nifty phone, I had the volume set on the highest possible setting, that just seemed to be a cool feature.  I always turned the TV up louder when I came to watch.  My husband would ask if I could turn it down,  annoying…. how will I hear the dialog.  But no… I’m not losing my hearing.   Then I finally went to have the ears tested.  Let’s just prove to these people once and for all - put this idea to bed - my ears are fine.

I went into the little sound proof room.  Raise your hand as soon as you hear something.   Left ear, right ear, front and back.  Now listen to these words and repeat back.  Some of the words didn’t make sense, but that’s probably just part of the test.  Looking good, I don’t think I missed anything, the rhythm of the test seemed steady.  Except for the parts where she was adjusting things.

Then the lady comes in and says - “Well… I could fit you for hearing aids today if you would like.”  I lost my breathe.  I said…” what???  But I did so well? ”  She says, “You heard everything you could.”

I started to tear up.  Then she said, “When do you have problems hearing?”  I said - well… just in loud restaurants or at church or when people whisper… (like at the temple) - but it’s not that big of a problem.”

She said - “Think about it, sounds like you need time to adjust to the news, but whenever you are ready - hearing aids will help.

Off to my car I went, with a goal to grow out my hair past my ears.  A year later, with long hair - I went to Costco to be fitted with hearing aids.  I was 45 years old.  So basically somewhere around 40 I started to lose my hearing.  The friendly guy at the Aloha Costco tested me again and put some percentages on my loss which were not encouraging.  He said I was missing some higher frequencies and missed the hard consonants - like T, P and K ’s etc.. which seems really weird, but that’s why the word test seems foreign in spots, cause I’m missing the beginning of the words.    So I got hearing aids.

I don’t wear them all the time.  I found out the world is much noisier than I had thought.  I thought our neighborhood was amazingly quiet.  Not so…  I thought my cats had the oddest meows.  Turns out I was just missing many of the pitches, so it was a little broken up.  I would probably get used to them if I wore them all the time, but they do tire me out.  It’s all too much to hear, after a large sabbatical.

They are great in restaurants.  I can block out the background noise and I can probably hear better than most people in noisy places now.   I didn’t go cheap - my hearing aids have many settings.  I still like to have the words on the bottom of the screen for reading dialog during movies.  Did you know that the actors don’t always say what’s scripted?  I also like the description of horse neighing etc…

I realized that I had been guessing what people were saying for a long time before I came to grips with my loss.  Sometimes… “That’s fun.” is the wrong response to someones comment.  Like if they say… “my father passed away.”  and you think they are telling you about their fathers last vacation… it just doesn’t work to guess.   I’ve had people tell me that when they first met me they thought I was rude, snobby, or aloof.  No, just in my own little zone and can’t hear you or have stopped trying to hear, cause it was frustrating.

So maybe I didn’t cause my own hearing loss.  But what if I didn’t help the situation… what if my kids who are predisposed to the genetic condition listen to their Ipods for more than an hour a day at a higher setting than recommended.  Will they start to go deaf before they are 40?   Our relatives live until their 90’s on both sides of the family… That’s a LONG time to not hear without a battery operated device.   Glad I have the option, but keeping your ears safe and well is the better route.

http://www.betterhearing.org/hearing_loss_prevention/?gclid=CJTP2onh0ZQCFR4vagodrXQ-kQ

Portland OR - LDS Artist Concerts

Looking for a great date night or family friendly venue?

Live in Portland OR - or plan to visit in June?

June 14th 2008 - Jim Band Produced - http://www.jimband.com/concerts.htm

 Stephanie Smith opening -  http://www.myspace.com/stephaniesmith  - to hear sample of her music.   Story teller through song - WONDERFUL

Eclipse - headliner -  http://eclipsesingers.com/  if you like great music take the time to see these guys. They are great.

WHERE: 

Century Senior High School
2000 SE Century Blvd
Hillsboro, OR

WHEN:  June 14th 2008  7:30

Tickets available through the Jim Band web site: http://www.jimband.com/concerts.htm

FLDS v.s. LDS what’s the dif?

Being a lifer LDS, (being born to parents already in Mormon/LDS church) I can only truly speak from my point of view but I’d like to point out the differences in the two religions from, again… my perspective.

They - the FLDS are getting a lot of press.  That messy situation in Texas and the Presidential race, although Mitt is out of it, have put some attention on our church.  It is causing my kid to get grief in school and questions, so the issue needs some clarification. 

Size of churches - FLDS 11,000 worldwide -   LDS 12 million worldwide

LDS -   USA total as 5,779,316, world total 12,868,606. Most of those outside of the USA are in Latin American countries

Dress code

FLDS do not cut the women’s hair, and wear long vintage looking dresses.   No make-up for the ladies.  Not sure on the guys…

LDS - the guideline is that we dress modestly, meaning covering: shoulders, cleavage, tush, and upper leg.  No short shorts.  Women keep piercings down to one in each ear, and no tattoos.  A guy - no piercings, no tattoo and similar to women in that modest dress is the guideline.  We still believe in dressing in our “Sunday Best” to go to church.  Girls in dresses, and guys wear dress shirts and ties.  We do this to show our respect for the Lord’s house.

Marriage - it’s the biggie

FLDS - this I’ve learned from interviews on Oprah and other news shows…  The men can have more than one wife.  The hook ups are set up by leaders, not the individuals involved, not even their parents…  They marry young, as young as 14 for sure, as that’s what got their Prophet sent to jail. They can be set up with first cousins.  If the girls don’t want to do it, they will be shunned and made to feel guilty.  Marriages can be rearranged by the prophet - even from jail?  I guess so.

LDS  - The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has not practiced polygamy for over 100 years.  We don’t encourage teen marriages.  We encourage our girls to go to college.  We fall in love and marry whom we want to.

This is the definition of polygamy on the LDS churches web site:

Influenced by rumors and exaggerated reports, the United States Congress, beginning in 1862, enacted a series of laws against polygamy that became increasingly harsh. Groups who teach polygamy today are not part of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

That is what it says on the LDS.org web site.   Can men be actively married to more than one wife, yes… just not two live ones.  If your wife dies, or divorces, a man can marry another wife in the temple.  This may seem unfair, I guess - If you feel that you would like to deal with more than one man in the afterlife… I would rather not.  Would I mind being surrounded by sisters… that’s do-able.    I used to joke that if the committment I’m making for an eternal companionship involves me and him and no girlsfriends… I’d rather not.  In rural areas of Tibet- Women marry more than one husband.  The women are the leaders and run the show in that culture.  Interesting.

So if the US Congress changed its mind and made polygamy legal, would the Church go back to the practice?  I just couldn’t guess… we do have a Prophet.  His name is Thomas S. Monson and if the Lord wanted us to do something, he would go through our Prophet.  I do know that Prophets in the Bible had multiple wives - so it’s something to think about, but can’t say I worry about it.  One of our beliefs is to be law-abiding citizens; we pay our taxes and finish our homes.  We do not feel the need to live on state lines.

I am sure there are other major differences, but I have limited knowledge about the FLDS church, so that is all I can compare.

I know that I do not feel repressed, or a prisoner by the guidelines of the LDS church.  I feel blessed and enjoy having personal revelation often that continues to teach me more about the plan of happiness and about our eternal progression.

Visit Mormon.org for more info regarding the teachings of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints

 

 

Martha Rides Solo

]When Martha was almost three I took her and Dirk to Minnesota to help my mother after a surgery.  We had been there a week and the day came to go home.  My mother lives in a condo on the 16^th floor over an Embassy Suites hotel in downtown Minneapolis.

I had gone somewhere with the kids and after parking the car in the underground parking ramp I got a shopping cart to take a sleeping Martha up and to help bring the luggage back down.  In the elevator a really sharp looking couple talked to me about how precious the sleeping Martha looked.  We only had a little while before we needed to leave for the airport, so I started to load the luggage in the shopping cart right away when we got to my mom’s condo.  When I said it was time to go, both kids ran down the long hallway to the elevator ahead of me while I struggled pushing a heavy shopping cart behind them over carpet.  All of a sudden I heard Dirk shouting and left the luggage and ran ahead to find only Dirk standing in front of the elevators.  He said that Martha had got on- I said which one and tried to get that elevator back.  When it opened a maintenance man with a floor washing bucket thing was on and I asked if he had seen my daughter and he said, “no one was on” when he entered.  Then I pretty much started to fall apart.  Between the fact that this was a 24-story building and connects by skyways to most of downtown and that strangers are scary – I was freaking out.  The maintenance man said; “let’s get down to the security on the first floor.” I was encouraged, as I pictured us looking at security camera monitors and finding her quickly.  That was not how the security person saw it… She said, okay you start on the lowest floor and I’ll go high… and then I realized we were really in trouble.  I went down to the parking area and when I opened the door, my mom was walking in and I said – Melissa is missing… in big sobbing cries and even though I had just showed too much emotion about Grandma’s cat… She figured it out when she saw that I only had  Dirk with me.  She said… “That’s ridiculous”, to the idea of going from floor to floor, and said, “let’s go back up to security.”  Well when the elevator door opened – the first thing we saw was that Sharp couple talking to the security woman with Martha right there.  Turns out that out of all the floors, Martha had ended up on their floor and she had walked off and went down the hall just like you would to my mom’s condo.  She wandered past their door, which miraculously was held open (breaking a condo association rule, not to leave your door open, because it sucks the AC from the halls…) The woman thought she saw Martha walk by out of the corner of her eye and went out and found her.

Talk about Miracles…   out of all the people that live in that building – the only ones I had chatted with all week – found Martha.   Coincidence – I think not.

Tender Mercies Get Me Through Each Day

Driving up to the drop box at the small local library in Cordova Tennessee, I had a very random thought come to my mind.  It seemed so random that I decided I better follow it.  I had driven right up to the box and had the handle opened to put the books we were returning in when my mind had the thought, “better take them into the library”.  I wasn’t planning on getting more books that day, but thought, “okay, but I don’t see why?”  I decided to let the big kids have a growing experience and sent them in with the books. 

 

This library is amazingly small.  It’s manned by one person and is smaller than anyone’s house.  It’s actually just a room in another building.  The kids went through the door and I expected them to be out in less than a minute.  When too much time passed,  I was starting the process to go in after them.  Right then the door of the library opened and out came my children and the librarian who told me that the tape was missing to the book/tape packet that I was returning.  Then I had the thought to look around the car.  Searching through the back seat, I looked in the side where it can fall down between the seat and the edge and sure enough there it was.

 

Now this might not seem like something the spirit would help you with.  It saved me the time of coming back when the library called to tell me it was missing, and possibly the chance of the tape falling into the street somewhere and not being noticed.  Then I would have to pay for the replacement.  I was very grateful for that experience.  Mostly it taught me that our father thinks that things are important, if they are important to us.  He wants to help us.  I wasn’t asking for specific help, but I was living my life with a prayer in my heart.

Where does inspiration come from?

In my reading lately - I’ve come across some authors that speak to me and teach me truths that explain aspect of my brain in ways that I haven’t understood before. 

Can non LDS (Mormon) people receive inspiration that would be worth our listening?  How would they have such a gift of the Holy Ghost if they have not been properly baptized?  Are they left on their own, these brothers and sisters until they run into missionaries? 

I believe – yes, we should be open to listening to people that are inspired.  If their message rings true they are most likely inspired by God.  A constant companion is the gift we are offered at baptism.  How many of us LDS folks can say they have truly accepted that gift. Constant being the key word. I think I do accept the gift on occassion, but fight with it more than I listen and go with it.  Logic rules much of them time.  The logic of the ego mind which is less than reliable.

Some great leaders paved the way for people to move closer to the full truth.  Many churches and theologies around the world hold many truths.  I want to change the way we LDS say – I believe this is the only true church.  Saying – I believe we have the fullness of the gospel that is available to us at this time – is more accurate.  To say that everyone else is wrong is a bit too general and just plain wrong and egotistical.

I’m so glad that there are preachers and writers out there that are making people ready to receive the fullness of the gospel.  They are encouraging people to do good, not just make merry for tomorrow you will be saved anyway.  That is not the message that is being preached in the things that I’m reading.  Saved – yes by His grace we will all be saved, and if we could really accept that at face value and not throw a ton of buts on it - we would be much closer to living a celestial life.  If we could accept where we are right now, be happy with how things are in our life, we would be preparing ourselves for more.  Constantly feeling that we are not doing enough is counterproductive.  It brings us down.  When we can handle where we are at now we will be given more.  The scriptures say we will never be given more than we can handle.  If it looks hard right now, with our list of – but I’m not doing this right… or this… then we will not be given more.

I’m not talking about stuff and riches here.  I’m talking about knowledge and responsibility to help in the plan.

Look back at all the people in history – that were not LDS – some did not even have a strong love of the Savior, yet they have been inspired to help with the preparation of the restoration.   Martin Luther added to the period of enlightenment that made it possible for the young Joseph Smith to be seeking and find followers that were also seeking and willing to accept something new.  The authors of the constitution and declaration of independance.  Religious tolerance was essential in the plan of restoring the gospel to the earth.   Ben Franklin was a gifted and inspired leader in so many areas.

Look at the classical composers – their music is so inspired.  Handel’s Messiah, Mozart, Beethoven – looking at their lives, they did not always live in such a way that you would think they could be so inspired, but God worked through them anyway.   There are current songs from popular artist that bring me to tears as the spirit teaches through their message.  The Lord is going to work with whoever will be ready to teach his message.  He knows that our missionaries are not going to be invited in every door.

As we prepare for the second coming of Christ – I believe that the Lord is going to use many people to get more and more people closer to the path.  Every knee will bow and every tongue confess - that Jesus is the Christ - savior to mankind.

Blossom as a Rose

Excited to have a spot to publish my stories that I continue to learn from.